 I thought long and hard before using the picture of the man falling from the burning World Trade Center for this blog entry. At first I thought it would be too disturbing to conjure up that image again. A man who knew he was going to die and made the decision as to how he would do just that. Neither alternative was one I am sure he had ever thought would be the one to end his life. I can only image how incredibly hot the flames were burning to force him into his decision.
It took him a few seconds from the time he began his free fall until it was ended. What was he thinking? Were his thoughts spent on how he was feeling at the time or was his mind quickly wandering back to when he got up that morning to go into work? Or, did he think of his family, his kids and wife? Or perhaps his final thoughts were of the fabulous vacation the family had just taken before school began. I choose to think he was engrossed in happy thoughts, with his eyes closed, and somehow he successfully removed himself from the fall. While I hesitated to use the falling man photo, I decided that it of all the photos of the incredibly unfortunate horrific event, the falling man photo automatically brings up that gut wrenching feelings that we all experienced on that day. And, the horror of it all is so very present in the photo. Yes, I used the photo to try to make us feel those feelings we experienced on September 11, 2001. As time moves on, the horror of it all tends to lessen and lessen. The ugliness of it all begins to ease and we somehow end up not feeling those fears we had many nights subsequent to the attacks. I am convinced that we need to preserve those thoughts and feelings. They need to be integrated into our culture and called upon frequently. We need the picture of the falling man stamped in our brains so that we never, ever forget. So, on this anniversary of 9/11, I remember those who lost their lives, I have disdain for those who committed the cowardly, deadly acts, and I pray that our nation will never experience such a tragedy again. May all its victims rest in peace! Before you go to bed this evening, hold your wife/husband/significant other and kids tight and tell them how much you love them. You know, the way you did 17 years ago! Until next time... Becky
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 Ever wonder about the etymology (the study of the origin of words and the way in which their meanings have changed throughout history) of the phrase "There's a new sheriff in town"? Actually, me neither until recently. But, the phrase has been thrown around lately due to the election of our new Knox County sheriff, Tom Spangler. And, that is the rumor! There's a new sheriff in town, you know!
First of all, the etymology of "There's a New Sheriff In Town" reveals it is a phrase meant to evoke the image of a traditional Southern or Western US town having a new sheriff come to power and shake things up for the town. To "shake things up" for Knox County is exactly what Sheriff Spangler has promised to do! To be honest,I don't know the state of the Knox County Sheriff's office. In fact, I know far less than I used to when I was married to Knox County Deputy Sargent Jim Wester, and our marriage ended in 2007. So, it has been a while. But, I have met and been around Spanky, uh Sheriff Spangler, three of four times. I've heard a lot about him through Jim. Sheriff Spangler and Jim were good friends and had a lot of respect for each other. I feel the Sheriff is a man of his word which is proving true in just his first few days of being in office. Back when I was a cop's wife, over 12 years ago, I worried about Jim all the time when he was on duty. Of course before he left the house at the beginning of each shift, he strapped a gun to his side. That one fact alone caused me concern, but you just learn to live with it. The next thing that caused me concern was the length of his work shifts and the fact that he rotated his hours, usually every 10 days. Sure, he would get "compensated" for his time, but the length of time he spent on duty each shift and the rotation of his shifts were so very physically difficult and demanding for him. I won't go into detail, but I have always thought his death at the age of 59 had a lot to do with the demands of his job, even though he was retired when he passed. Twenty eight years of anything impacting your health can't be good for you. Well, Sheriff Spangler has already started to address the time factor of deputy shifts. As I understand it, he has shortened the hours that they are on duty each shift. He has worked it, he knows what it is like. Thanks God for Sheriff Spangler, I say!!!! I am anxious to find out what else he is going to do. I think he recognizes and appreciates the constant fear of the job that has to stay hidden and not actually dealt with by each deputy. He knows about the nightmares that deputies experience due to what they see and hear on duty. He knows about being sleepy when going into work and being wired when getting off. He knows about all the holidays deputies work while having to leave their families to fin for themselves. And, last but far from least, he is cognizant of the increased threat of being ambushed by a crazy man while on duty. Sheriff Spangler is a deputes' sheriff!!!! I wish Sheriff Spangler much success because his success means the betterment of the sheriff's department and the good of the deputies. But, he has a long road ahead of him, so my thoughts and prayers are with him. Until next time... Becky  ...Let's see...what do I have that I can complain about today? Well, my shoulder pain seems to be getting worse instead of better. Hurt just to hold a little mirror and put on mascara this morning. However, I don't intend to have surgery, so I am just going to complain about it every day!!!! No, actually I am THINKING about going to the doctor to see if he can refer me for physical therapy without surgery. But then I know that will hurt bad so I just don't know what I am going to do. I wish I was a little girl and my parents were making the decision as to what should be done. I just hate to be grown up sometimes... ...On the other hand, after about 2 hours of the repairman working on my AC yesterday, I think it is working fairly well now. He said it is just an old air conditioner and can't keep up with the hot days we've been having. I can relate to being old and not being able to keep up!!! Of course, my insurance don't pay for replacing old air conditioners!... ...I love Michael McDonald! Have loved his music for years and years. Well, I get to go see him at the Tennessee Theater soon!!!! Have you ever seen an old woman swoon over an old man before? I am afraid that will be me at his concert!... ...Well, football season is finally in full swing. First game for college football was last week and the pro football season kicked off last night. I am more excited about the college games than the pros this year as both Peyton and Jason Witten both are not retired. Of course there is Josh Dobbs who is reportedly in competition for the backup quarterback position for the Steelers. But, as far as the college season, I just think the season is too short. After just one game there are just 10 more to play. Yep, too short in my book...  ...My 67th birthday is fast approaching. I hate to know that many years have passed me by, but I don't like the alternative either. At least I do look forward to my birth day as fall is my favorite time of the year. Football, leaves changing, a nip in the air, sweaters, hot coca, maybe a fire, jeans with boots, yep I love it all. The fall colors should be fairly brilliant this year as much rain as we have had. I sure hope so...
...Well, my web site business, so to speak, isn't doing too well! Actually, it is more of a hobby than a business. However, I don't have any customers. I have done a couple of sites for other people and that's it! So, I am going to have to find me something to do that allows me to use my web site skills without designing web sites!!!! That is probably an impossible goal, but I am thinking on it. Maybe I will come up with something!!!!... ...Ya know, I personally don't like Donald Trump. I think he is a lot of things that I deplore. The one thing that really bothers me about him is his name calling and making fun of people. That is so childish and gets on my nerves. However, I have to admit I did vote for him only because I thought anything was better than Hillary, and I still think that. But, as President Donald Trump I try to respect the office and I do think he has done some good things. And where I have concerns about what he and his administration does, I do try to give them the benefit of the doubt. Call me crazy, but I do... ...That's it! That's about all I have rolling around in my little brain. Well, that's not exactly the truth. There are other things I could write about but I have learned that a person can't just open the top of their head and let everything pour out. Hummmmm...maybe that is what bothers me the most about President Trump, come to think about it. Sometimes it seems that there is a big hole in the top of his head and whatever is in there just spews out! No filter whatsoever. Until next time... Becky  I am so over the Kavanaugh hearings. I have never seen a bunch of adults, some of both sides, who are suppose to be professional lawmakers act like such children. As a matter of fact, if I had a child and s/he acted like some of them I would take her/him out and give her/him a good spanking. I will have to say the Democrats seem to be out performing the Republicans in this acting out fiasco. But then that's the side that hates, and I mean truly hates, Trump, as Kavanaugh is his nominee.
I am just glad school is in session and most children do not have a chance to see most of the hearings...well, unless their teacher uses it for part of her/his lesson plan and turns on the television. The last time I remember anything that comes close to these current day hearings was back in the early 1990's with the confirmation hearings of Clarence Thomas. However, the difference here is clearly on issues rather than personal feelings toward the person who nominated him. Those hearings didn't get just merely continuous, but, as Justice Thomas asserted in his closing remarks, they became a "high-tech lynching". The basic issues were abortion and the alleged sexual harassment of one, Anita Hill. I remember being glued to the television to see what was going to happen next. But, this time around, it is painful beyond measure to watch so I usually just read about what is going on or catch a summary of the hearings on the news. In general our government is a mess these days, and I don't care for whom you voted. But, you might want to get to the polls your next opportunity and vote to change the mess!!!! Just saying... Until next time... Becky  What does one do when one purchases some software and cannot get it installed on ones computer? If one is a blogger, one writes about her experience in her blog! Thus, the topic of this blog entry.
Paint Shop Pro 2108 was my program of choice for editing photos and creating web site "stuff", or so I thought. But alas, I couldn't get the little execute file that allows you to install any software on a computer to even appear. So, I had to resort to going into the file tree, you know, that place where all your files are that looks like a tree, and try to install the thing manually. That didn't work either. So, after many attempts I resorted to sending an email to the Paint Shop Pro customer support informing them of my dilemma and asked for their assistance. Heaven knows I wasn't expecting what I got. I could bore you to death quoting emails (and there were many) from AK, their customer support tech. However, to this day I swear s/he/it is a computer/robot! There was little to no sign of humanness in her/his/its correspondence. S/he/it was as rote as it comes in trying to communicate what I needed to do to have a successful instillation of their product. Regardless of her/his/its efforts, and mine, we were just not able to get the thing installed. It is as simple as that. In our own little way, AK and I developed a sort of a relationship through our email communications. I would be brief and somewhat curt. S/he/it would be very, and I mean very, technical, specific, and to the point. I would try to crack a joke, and it would fly over her/his/its head. Our communications eventually became almost romantic. I don't think we fell in love, but we definitely developed some kind of feelings toward each other! While emails were flying back and forth between AK and myself, I discovered another paint shop program on my computer that I had forgotten I had. If you know me, you know I am capable to doing something like that! No need to go into detail as to how this happened, it just happened. So, I sent yet another email to AK and told her/him/it no need to prolong the misery for both of us that I was giving up, thanks for her/his/its help. I forgot about it. Well, tonight I was checking my email and realized I had another email from AK. And, bless her/his/its heart, she/he/it had not given up. The email included step by step instructions as to what I needed to further do, which included sending her/him/it reports generated by my computer, as another attempt to get the software installed. I could not resist. I sent the following reply to AK's email: Greetings AK!!!! I was very surprised when I received your last email. I thought I had been long forgotten. I appreciate your continued efforts on my behalf. Fortunately, or unfortunately I guess, I have acquired an old version of Jasc Paint Shop Pro 7.0 and am perfectly happy with what it can do for me. It installed the first attempt, and I've been using it to make buttons for my web sites, creating interesting photos, and even made a few .gif's. So, I don't need Corel Paint Shop Pro any longer, thank you very much! I hate that you went to the trouble of providing me with instructions of yet additional "stuff" (my words, not yours) to send to you. You are a sweet heart for putting up with this old lady as long as you have. I wish you well. I still wonder about you, whether you are human or a robot. Oh, you did loosen up a bit but not much. That's okay, we are who we are. AK, if you ever get bored sometime feel free to send me another email. I do like hearing from ya!!! Sorry, I guess I am being a little facetious and having fun at your expense. I seriously do appreciate your attempts to assist me. I am sorry it just didn't help much! Take care AK! To my surprise I did get one last email reply from AK. In it s/he/it referred to me as "dear". A break through!!!! Maybe we did fall in love! Well, the bottom line is do not ever buy Corel products! You might find yourself communicating with AK and that might make me jealous!!!!! Until next time... Becky  I love football, especially college football. So, yesterday's opening day of the college football season was right up my alley. I didn't watch games all day long as I was otherwise preoccupied by other things and people I also enjoy, but I did watch the Tennessee vs. West Virginia game. I made sure that was the order of the day as I just can't miss my Vols. However, I will admit yesterday was a little rough to watch. But, I learned somethings from those short three or four hours. Oh, come on! You can learn from anything in life and football isn't the exception to the rule. So, here we go...
1) Expectations were too high! I personally know that my expectations for the Vols yesterday was too high, but I also know that there were many whose expectations were far higher than mine. I said before the game that I was concerned that they wouldn't win, but I would be satisfied with a well played, hard fought game. Well, while I can't say that the entire game was well played, I can say the game had its highs along with its lows. I can also say that I think the team fought harder than teams of our recent past. At least they did score two touchdowns!!! And, they seem to play with a purpose. Some teams in the past made me feel they weren't even sure why they were on the field in the first place. 2) Jeremy Pruitt is the man!!! In case you missed it, he went for a touch down on a 4th and goal!!! Not only did he go for it, he (the team, of course) made it. Yes, a touchdown was made. In my humble opinion that is a major improvement over past game calling and play. At that moment Coach Pruitt should have won the hearts of the Vol nation, at least for a little while. Was that the case? Hum...it didn't seem to last long if at all. 3) Television does not always seem to be our friend. The University of Tennessee's reputation was damaged in a major fashion with the hunt for a new coach this past year. But, it is over and we do have a new coach and he is busy going about establishing himself as the coach. So, I ask you, why was CBS compelled to not only bring the subject up, but also use a graphic that listed all of the coaches that were sought in the big hunt, so to speak? It is over CBS. Give us a break! 4) Jarrett Guarantano seems to pretty much have the job wrapped up. He is not, nor will he ever be, Peyton Manning. Heck, he ain't even Josh Dobbs. He is who he is, plays the way he plays, and has his own set of skills. Guarantano is not the easiest name to say, but his name will hopefully be on the tongues of us all in a positive, respectful way because, well, he is the quarterback. For that he deserves a certain amount of respect. What he does with it, we have yet to see. 5) Our running game stank yesterday! What, you thought I was going to let them get away from any criticism? Absolutely not! We could not get anything going by running the ball but there sure were some excellent passes thrown and, I might add, caught. Again, we scored two touchdowns. 6) And finally, we have a fickle fan base. Actually I didn't just learn that yesterday, I've known it for a long, long time. But, yesterday just reinforced the fact that many Vol fans' find favor when things are going well. However, let their expectations not be met and you have some fans acting like cry babies. I don't get it. Now, if you want to be a fair weather fan, try the NFL. There you have a bunch of grown men being paid millions to get the ball over the goal line. And, when they don't, that's when being a fair weather fan may be justified. But, don't take the same attitude with college aged young men who are still growing, physically, mentally, and emotionally. They need our support, our undying support especially when things are not going so good. As a college football fan we have an obligation to build the players up, not tear them down because they lost a game. Particularly when they actually show up for the game, and I do feel like the Vols showed up yesterday. As far as I am concerned, Jeremy Pruitt is as much the coach today as he was yesterday, maybe even more so. He has a big job before him but he knew that, and we knew that, when he took the job. Now, let's all get in there and support him and the team. Let's let Coach Pruitt have a legitimate building year. It may even take two or three years. But, progress should be what we are after, slow and steady progress. Because I guarantee you we are not going to the big championship game as soon as maybe some Vol fans were hoping. Until next time... Becky  Back in the day, even further back then my day, there was a song entitled, "Jeepers, Creepers". It was a catchy little tune and one that I have caught myself singing in my mind a thousand times. Why? Because I used to be a Jeeper! Yes, you read that correctly, I used to identify with a Jeep. I was definitely a Jeeper! When I met my husband he had two vehicles. Well, I guess you could say two vehicles. He owned a four door sedan of some sort and a grey, 1960 something, rag top Jeep! Now, being as I met Jim in 1983, the Jeep was at least 20 years old, but it was beautiful! Never mind the fact that when it rained and went through standing water it tended to stop dead in its tracks. I still loved it. In fact, that was one of the reasons I think I fell in love with Jim! Jim was a Jeeper from way back. He had been president of one of the local Jeep clubs for a while and had gone on many an off road trip by the time I met him. He worked on Jeeps, he talked about Jeeps, he drove Jeeps, yep Jim loved Jeeps. So, it is a good thing I feel in love with old grey when I first saw her. Needless to say, the first vehicle I bought after we got married was a Jeep, a Jeep Grand Cherokee. At this point you are probably thinking, well big deal she bought a Jeep Grand Cherokee. And you are right it was not a rag top, nor was it not air conditioned, nor did it stop when it got wet! It was a really nice car inside and out. However, that did not stop us from going Jeeping in it on weekends and me driving it to work on Monday morning. Also, it was the first Jeep that Jim had driven that had the capacity of changing to 4 wheel drive inside the vehicle instead of having to get outside and turning the hubs on the wheels. So, he thought he had died and gone to heaven. This first Jeep also presented me with a new challenge. I was about 35 years old and had never driven a stick shift! And, yes, the new Jeep Cherokee had just that! But, with the help of Jim's sister, I was out and driving the thing on the streets of Knoxville and Oak Ridge in no time. I also fell in love with straight shifts and drove nothing else until I got too old, or so I thought, to hold the clutch down in traffic. So, we had old grey when we first got married. Then we went into a Jeep Grand Cherokee. We had great times in the Grand Cherokee. We went on 4 wheel drive trails you would not have believed. We forged trails in the thing. But still, there was something missing and we finally figured it out. Old grey was still in our blood and we had to get a "real" Jeep. The next Jeep we owned, and the likes of which we continued to own, was a red rag top. It wasn't old grey, she had long died. But it was a rag top and that was what was important, at least to us it was. Hello weekends, here we came! Eventually Jim took the big step and ordered a custom made red Jeep Rubicon. It was still a rag top, but it had all the bells and whistles on it. Plus, it had a sticker on the inside that said, "Made especially for Jim Wester." Now, he really thought he had died and gone to heaven. It was absolutely beautiful. We now had the vehicle of our dreams, so we had to take it on the trip of our dreams. And we did. We left Knoxville early one August morning and headed out west, on back roads not the interstate! We took state roads up north and out west through Kentucky, Indiana, Illinois, North and South Dakota, Nebraska, Utah, Colorado, Nevada, and just a small speck of California. We started back east through Arizona, New Mexico, Texas, Oklahoma, and then on home. We were gone close to three weeks and traveled more than 2,000 miles. We did get on the interstate at some point coming back home, but the majority of those miles were either on state roads or off road. We had a great time and great memories. But, life happened and the good times came to an end. I eventually went back to buying just cars, Jim and I divorced, he got sick with pancreatic cancer and passed away, and now it is just me and my baby dogs. Well, I was doing good until I got to this point. What else can I say? Life did truly happen! In any event, I am so thankful for those memories. The jeeps, the trip, the 4 wheel drive outings, and me and Jim in love. Those were great days and I will always have those memories. Life is good today, just different. Oh, the song, I found the song, Jeepers, Creepers on youtube! Thought you might like to hear it. Like I said, catchy little tune! Until the next time...happy trails to you! Becky  Have you ever thought about the fact that every year we pass the anniversary of our death without knowing it? That, my friend, is a mortality awakening!
I thought about that fact one day recently and wondered to myself if that day could be THE day. The day when my soul will leave my earthly body and go to my heavenly home forever. Though I find peace in that thought, I also find a bit of fear. I am not fearful of dying, I am fearful of how I will die. I would prefer I just go to sleep one day and avoid any kind of painful experience or illness. But, we do not actually get to choose how we die, now do we? Ever since November 19, 2009, I have had strange thoughts about death. You see, that date is when my mom went to her heavenly home in the middle of the night. That was her 80th trip to the date November 19th, but she never knew that would be her last time there. Mom had Alzheimer's and was residing in assisted living for Alzheimer's patients when she fell and hit her head for the last time. She was taken to the ER and subsequently placed in ICU. Due to the trauma she experienced to her head when she fell, she had brain hemorrhage, from which she never actually recovered. She was eventually removed from ICU and from there was placed in a nursing home. She remained in the nursing until her death. From the time Mom was placed in the assisted living facility she cried to go home. We were told that most probably she was crying to go to her childhood home, as is the case for most Alzheimer's patients. But one day Dad went and got Mom out of the facility and drove her around. In fact, he drove her to the home they had shared for several years. Mom did not respond, had no reaction that she recognized that she was at her home. So sad since she had cried so many times to go home. It was a rather strange circumstance when, on November 19, 2009, we had put into place all the necessary arrangements to in fact take her home one last time. Although we knew she most probably wouldn't know that she was home, I think we thought it would give us some degree of peace. On the night of November 18th, I stayed at the nursing home with her. Although difficult, I was trying to sleep in a chair that made a small bed beside Mom's bed. I would wake up every now and then, check on Mom, go to the bathroom, and then settle back down in the small bed and try to sleep. Evidently I did go to sleep at some point as I was awaken by a couple of nurses who were telling me they needed to turn Mom and I would need to leave the room. I left the room and was standing in the hall when one of the nurses came running out and down the hall. In a few seconds later she came back carry some linens. She went back into the room and was in there for several minutes before she came back out and told me my dear, sweet mom had passed away. The thought of Mom dying wasn't a problem for me as I knew where she had gone. Oh, I knew I was going to miss her a lot. But, her passing meant that in that moment she was made whole and was out of any kind of pain or distress she was experiencing here on earth. What was a problem, and continues to be to some extent, is the fact that she left without me being there, holding her hand when she drew her last breath. I was asleep and not there when she needed me the most. Well, Mom didn't get to go back home and that was disappointing for us. But, she died peacefully where she was. She went in her sleep just like she always wanted to do. Today is a day that we have all lived each year that we have been alive. Unfortunately, it will also be the date that many people will never live again. As a matter of fact, and I don't think it will be, it could be my last August 28th. Furthermore, it could be your last August 28th. Who knows when we will draw our last breath? But one thing is for sure, there is a date that has our name written on it. A date unknown to us, but a date for which we are steadily moving toward. A date we get closer to day after day after day. Until the next time... Becky  I got up this morning feeling somewhat depressed. I then realized the passing of one of our country's most respected and admired leaders probably had a lot to do with how I was feeling. I got me a cup of coffee and sat down at the computer and clicked on Facebook. Much to my surprise I found one of Facebook's friendship anniversary announcements that I had been friends with Karen Shultz for whatever number of years. That made me even more depressed because my sweet Karen, aka Barney, will have been dead for four years in October. So, it was a rather sad day until I started remembering Barney and all the wonderful times we had together. Therefore, this blog post is about those good memories. Barney grew up in a little community called Claxton, just outside Clinton, Tennessee. Clinton is just a county over from Knox County. I didn't know Barney as she was growing up as I was growing up too, but in another part of the state. "Barn" went to the local schools and graduated from high school in 1970. I honestly don't know at what point she started working at the Methodist Medical Center in Oak Ridge, Tennessee, but I am pretty sure it was early on after graduation. In any event, she began working there in the administrative offices and was employed there for many, many years. She loved the work and her outgoing personally was perfect for interaction with patients. While she was working for the hospital in Oak Ridge, I started working for the Tennessee Department of Correction in Knoxville. I was one foster home counselor who covered a catchment area of 17 counties. Yep, it was a lot of work but I enjoyed it. However, I became friends with one of the probation officers in the office, Kay Bettis, and we decided to move into an apartment together. We hadn't lived in the apartment long before we met Terri Allen and Gwen Childress. They were our neighbors and we became friends fast. In an effort to make a long story short, Terri and Gwen had a high school friend who visited them often. Her name was, of course, Barney, and Kay and I became friends with her as well. Needless to say the five of us, plus a couple other girls, started doing everything together. When we weren't at work, we were together having a ball. Again, to make a long story short, after several years of friendship Barney and I moved into an apartment together in Oak Ridge. At that time I was director of a delinquent girls' group home and it was only logical to move to the big city! Of course I was thrilled with the opportunity to live with Barney as she was so much fun and I knew she would make a wonderful roommate, and she did. Life with Barney was one big thrill after another. She was always making me laugh. But, more importantly she was always there when I needed her. One specific time of need was when I became deathly ill and had to have emergency surgery. I was not established as a patient with a doctor at that time so Barney took it upon herself and got me an appointment that day with one of the surgeons at the hospital. Had it not been from her getting that appointment, I could have died from a very painful abscess that was infecting my entire body. I guess the one thing that stands out in my mind above all the things that Barney and I did while we lived together was our cruise to the Bahamas. Now, this was back in the late 1970's, so it has been a while. But the cruise was marvelous. However, getting ready to go on the cruise was a hoot! Barney drove an orange VW. Yep, the old VW bugs with the engine in the trunk of the car. And, of course, it was a sick shift. When we decided to take her car we knew that Barney was going to have to teach me how to drive the thing. What she didn't know was that I was basically unteachable. My dad had tried to teach me to drive a VW when I was in college, but I never got the hang of it. And, the same held true with when Barney tried. We would go out and get on a low traffic road and she would put me behind the wheel. Needless to say, we would bump, bump, bump our way down the road. Never did get that thing running smoothly. When it came time to go on our trip Barney felt I was ready for the big road and would be able to help her drive. The trip down to Miami was not bad. We took our time and Barney didn't have to be relieved of driving. The trip back was another story. We were getting close to Atlanta and Barney kept telling me how tired she was and that I was going to have to take over driving. I kept trying to put her off, but the time came that Barney just couldn't stand it any longer. Here we are on one of the busiest interstates in downtown Atlanta at rush hour. She pulls over to the side of the road, gets out, and makes me drive. All I can do is throw up my hands and hope for the best. What happened? Bump, bump, bump....stop. Bump, bump, bump...stop. No I could not get the car to travel more than a few yards at a time until it would stop. And, there are hundreds of cars flying pass us. I was scared. Barney was mad. It was a mess. So, poor old Barn got back out of the car and drove us home. I don't think she talked to me for several days afterward. Yep, the ride back home was a night mare. But, the cruise was fantastic and after she got over being mad at me we both agreed that it was all worth it. Let me quickly add, however, that I did eventually learn to drive a straight shift and did so for many years! Barney was my maid of honor at my wedding. At that point in our lives we were just like sisters and her place was right up there with me. She was a beautiful maid of honor and was so happy for me. I will never forget our trip to the church that day on July 30th, 1983. Dad drove a van with Mom in the passenger's seat. Barney and I were in the back and being nervous, anxious, and acting crazy like we always did. Now, you need to know that I was 32 and Barn was 31, so we were grown women. But, when "Going To The Chapel And We Are Going To Get Married" came on the radio, we bellowed that song out to the top of our lungs. We sang and sang like we were 16 years old. What a sweet memory! Barney didn't go on my honeymoon with me, but I would have not objected if she had. She always made whatever the occasion was a blast. However, she stayed home and me and my husband did the honeymoon thing. Unfortunately, during the time we were gone Barney's apartment, we weren't living together at that point, burnt to the ground. She lost everything she owned and her precious cat, Rico, passed away. Barney was rightly devastated and it took her a little while to get a new apartment and to begin getting her life back together. But, through it all she never lost her sense of humor. She was a trooper in every sense of the word. There are so many more stories I could tell about Barney. But, reliving these as I have written them has made a warm spot in my heart. We had a special friendship and I will always remember her. The last time I saw Barney was the night of her birthday on September 17th the year she passed away on October 4th. She has just had surgery and was in residential rehab. Me and Cathy Morton, another really good friend, and I took a surprise birthday party to her. One of her brothers and his wife was there. We all had a great time and Barney was so happy to see us. Little did I know that that would be the last time I would see her here on earth. One of the things that I haven't mentioned about Barney is that she loved Jesus, even more so in her final years. She was a better person than me as she went to church every Sunday and sang in the choir. She even went on overseas trips with the choir. So, I know that when she passed she went straight to heaven, and that gives me peace. I know that I will get to be with her again one day. Well, that's my Barney. Miss her so very, very much. One of the best friends I ever had.  I am a blessed woman. I am a very blessed woman. I have been blessed all my life. Oh, my life hasn't been perfect, but it sure has been blessed. When I think of the blessings I have experienced in life I can list the big ones without any problem. The first one that pops into my mind occurred when I was a young child. I was very ill and had an allergic reaction to medication. I had to be rushed to the hospital where I nearly died. However, the Lord spared my life and I am here, nearly 67 years later, to tell you about it. A couple or three years after my swipe with death, I accepted Jesus as my Savior and was saved. That was, and continues to be, the greatest blessing of all. Through my acceptance of Jesus I am promised eternal life. Now, don't get me wrong. I have done plenty of sinning in my life. I have not been the Christian I should and could be. I pray daily that God will forgive me of all my sins, which is a boat load. And, He has promised that if I ask in His name He will forgive me. I feel His forgiveness and what a blessing that is to know. Another huge blessing that I experienced is that God sent a wonderful guidance counselor into my life when I was a senior in high school. Had it not been for her, I would never have gone to college, gotten a degree, and then worked for nearly 32 years with juvenile delinquents. I know my work with young people at risk was my calling. And, it is actually amazing how God worked in my life throughout my career. I consider my marriage of nearly 25 years a major blessing. Yes, it ended in divorce and even through that I saw God blessing me. But my marriage gave me the opportunity to experience true human love. I would have hated to have lived and died and never experience such a strong and compelling emotion. I guess the last "big" blessing from God occurred recently. As a matter of fact this happened just a few weeks ago. It has taken me a little while to realize what a wonderful blessing it was, but with a little time I see things more clearly. My dad and stepmother's air conditioning went on the blink. This was during a time of extreme heat here in Knoxville and there was no way they could stay in their home. They are in their mid to late 80's and therefore a more dire situation than it might have been if they were younger. It is a long story as far as the repair of the air conditioner, but they ended up spending 13 days/nights with me. Yes it was, and they will tell you this, 13 long and stress filled days/nights. The three of us, and my two baby dogs, co-existed in my two bedroom condo during that time. And, to be honest, it is not something I would like to do again any time soon, but I would if I had to. That being said, we survived and did so without anyone dying or getting seriously injured!!!! Now you might ask what in the world could I have found one blessing, let alone several blessings, from that most stressful two weeks period of my life. Well, I got to spend time with two people I love more than anything. I got to spend daily living time, not just passing time. We did everything together for two weeks that is routine for a family, but not so much at our ages and at this point in our lives. God blessed me with that time, I have no doubt. As is so routine for God, He is able to take that which might not be so pleasant for us humans and make a big, wonderful blessing out of it. As I have said, I have had big blessings all my life. I have also have had, and continue to have, those little daily blessings that I too often take for granted. I am real bad about not remembering my good health. That is a daily blessing that is so easy to forget. My newly pressure washed driveway is a blessing, My getting to sit out on my screened in porch and enjoy nature has been such a blessing this summer. Getting to cuddle with my baby dogs on the couch almost daily blesses me so much. Getting to see and visit with my special friends and family members from time to time blesses me greatly. I could go on and on. Yes, I am a blessed woman and have no doubt that will never change. Until I take my last breath, God will continue to bless my life. For that, I am so very thankful. I found the following poem that expresses so much concerning blessings and how they come to us sometimes in the most unexpected ways. It spoke to my heart and I hope it speaks to yours. Until next time...Becky "Blessings"
by Laura Story We pray for blessings, we pray for peace Comfort for family, protection while we sleep We pray for healing, for prosperity We pray for Your mighty hand to ease our suffering And all the while, You hear each spoken need Yet love us way too much to give us lesser things 'Cause what if your blessings come through rain drops What if Your healing comes through tears What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know You're near What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise We pray for wisdom, Your voice to hear We cry in anger when we cannot feel You near We doubt your goodness, we doubt your love As if every promise from Your word is not enough And all the while, You hear each desperate plea And long that we'd have faith to believe 'Cause what if your blessings come through rain drops What if Your healing comes through tears What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know You're near What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise When friends betray us When darkness seems to win We know that pain reminds this heart That this is not, This is not our home It's not our home 'Cause what if your blessings come through rain drops What if Your healing comes through tears What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know You're near What if my greatest disappointments or the aching of this life Is the revealing of a greater thirst this world can't satisfy What if trials of this life The rain, the storms, the hardest nights Are your mercies in disguise |
AuthorOne day at a time eventually makes a life...Becky Wester 
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Becky's Random Thoughts & Daily Blessings
